Sunday, April 27, 2014

GodsView : Ways Parents Provoke Children!

GodsView : Ways Parents Provoke Children!: In Ephesians 6:4 , Paul writes, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction ...

Ways Parents Provoke Children!

In Ephesians 6:4, Paul writes, "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." In our series these last two weeks, we've looked at both discipline (specifically, spanking) and instruction (specifically, evangelism). Today, we will look at the command to not provoke.
To "provoke...to anger" suggests a repeated, ongoing pattern of treatment that gradually builds up a deep-seated anger and resentment that boils over in outward hostility.
Such treatment is usually not intended to provoke anger. Here are eight ways in which parents can provoke their children to anger:
Overprotection
1) Well-meaning overprotection is a common cause of resentment in children. Parents who smother their children, overly restrict where they can go and what they can do, never trust them to do things on their own, and continually question their judgment build a barrier between themselves and their children — usually under the delusion that they are building a closer relationship. Children need careful guidance and certain restrictions, but they are individual human beings in their own right and must learn to make decisions on their own, commensurate with their age and maturity. Their wills can be guided but they cannot be controlled.
Favoritism
2) Another common cause of provoking children to anger is favoritism. Isaac favored Esau over Jacob and Rebekah preferred Jacob over Esau. That dual and conflicting favoritism not only caused great trouble for the immediate family but has continued to have repercussions in the conflicts between the descendants of Jacob and Esau until our present day! For parents to compare their children with each other, especially in the children's presence, can be devastating to the child who is less talented or favored. He will tend to become discouraged, resentful, withdrawn, and bitter.
Favoritism by parents generally leads to favoritism among the children themselves, who pick up the practice from their parents. They will favor one brother or sister over the others and will often favor one parent over the other.
Achievement
3) A third way parents provoke their children is by pushing achievement beyond reasonable bounds. A child can be so pressured to achieve that he is virtually destroyed. He quickly learns that nothing he does is sufficient to please his parents. No sooner does he accomplish one goal than he is challenged to accomplish something better. Fathers who fantasize their own achievements through the athletic skills of their sons, or mothers who fantasize a glamorous career through the lives of their daughters prostitute their responsibility as parents.
I once visited a young woman who was confined to a padded cell and was in a state of catatonic shock. She was a Christian and had been raised in a Christian family, but her mother had ceaselessly pushed her to be the most popular, beautiful, and successful girl in school. She became head cheerleader, homecoming queen, and later a model. But the pressure to excel became too great and she had a complete mental collapse. After she was eventually released from the hospital, she went back into the same artificial and demanding environment. When again she found she could not cope, she committed suicide. She had summed up her frustration when she told me one day, "I don't care what it is I do, it never satisfies my mother."
Discouragement
4) A fourth way children are provoked is by discouragement. A child who is never complimented or encouraged by his parents is destined for trouble. If he is always told what is wrong with him and never what is right, he will soon lose hope and become convinced that he is incapable of doing anything right. At that point he has no reason even to try. Parents can always find something that a child genuinely does well, and they should show appreciation for it. A child needs approval and encouragement in things that are good every bit as much as he needs correction in things that are not.
Unwanted
5) A fifth way provocation occurs is by parents' failing to sacrifice for their children and making them feel unwanted. Children who are made to feel that they are an intrusion, that they are always in the way and interfere with the plans and happiness of the parents, cannot help becoming resentful. To such children the parents themselves will eventually become unwanted and an intrusion on the children's plans and happiness.
Growth
6) A sixth form of provocation comes from failing to let children grow up at a normal pace. Chiding them for always acting childish, even when what they do is perfectly normal and harmless, does not contribute to their maturity but rather helps confirm them in their childishness.
Manipulation
7) A seventh way of angering children is that of using love as a tool of reward or punishment — granting it when a child is good and withdrawing it when he is bad. Often the practice is unconscious, but a child can sense if a parent cares for him less when is he disobedient than when he behaves. That is not how God loves and is not the way he intends human parents to love. God disciplines His children just as much out of love as He blesses them. "Those whom the Lord loves He disciplines" (Heb. 12:6). Because it is so easy to punish out of anger and resentment, parents should take special care to let their children know they love them when discipline is given.
Abuse
8) An eighth way to provoke children is by physical and verbal abuse. Battered children are a growing tragedy today. Even Christian parents — fathers especially — sometimes overreact and spank their children much harder than necessary. Proper physical discipline is not a matter of exerting superior authority and strength, but of correcting in love and reasonableness. Children are also abused verbally. A parent can as easily overpower a child with words as with physical force. Putting him down with superior arguments or sarcasm can inflict serious harm, and provokes him to anger and resentment. It is amazing that we sometimes say things to our children that we would not think of saying to anyone else — for fear of ruining our reputation!
In closing, consider the confession of one Christian father,
My family's all grown and the kids are all gone. But if I had to do it all over again, this is what I would do. I would love my wife more in front of my children. I would laugh with my children more — at our mistakes and our joys. I would listen more, even to the littlest child. I would be more honest about my own weaknesses, never pretending perfection. I would pray differently for my family; instead of focusing on them, I'd focus on me. I would do more things together with my children. I would encourage them more and bestow more praise. I would pay more attention to little things, like deeds and words of thoughtfulness. And then, finally, if I had to do it all over again, I would share God more intimately with my family; every ordinary thing that happened in every ordinary day I would use to direct them to God.

GodsView : The God Who Became a Man!

GodsView : The God Who Became a Man!: This time, when our thoughts turn toward the wondrous story of our Savior's birth, a lesser-known incident from Jesus' early child...

The God Who Became a Man!

This time, when our thoughts turn toward the wondrous story of our Savior's birth, a lesser-known incident from Jesus' early childhood comes to mind — one I find especially poignant.
Before Jesus had reached His second birthday, He had already become the target of an assassination plot by King Herod, the ruthless and paranoid ruler of Roman-controlled Judea. Joseph and Mary, prompted by a dream from God, took the baby and fled the country. I imagine the sense of responsibility must have been heavy on their young and slender shoulders — they were the chosen caretakers of the very God of the universe, come in human flesh.
I'm always struck by how ironic their flight to Egypt was — the humble infant King taking refuge in the very nation from whose hand He had powerfully delivered the children of Israel so many generations earlier. While the record gives no clear indication one way or the other, I suspect the people of Egypt were never aware of Jesus' divine and royal identity — He certainly wasn't what they would have expected from a king.
Egypt's history was one proud and glorious procession of kings spanning thirty dynasties and nearly 3,000 years. Egyptian kings — the pharaohs — were powerful figures and rich beyond imagination. They wielded wealth like a weapon, built sprawling cities, commanded huge armies, lived in lavish homes, ate the best food, drank the best wine, wore the most extravagant jewelry, and spared no expense when it came to their standard of living.
The pharaohs' standard of dying wasn't bad either. They obviously never heard the saying, "You can't take it with you." Concern for their lot in the afterlife was integral to Egyptian religion, and so their custom was to pack their burial chambers with supplies they would need as they traveled to their next life. King Tut's tomb proved they didn't travel lightly.
But expecting to live forever wasn't a pharaoh's only outrageous aspiration. Records indicate Egyptian kings assumed, and were given, supernatural status. The pharaoh was thought to be responsible for bringing the floods that watered Egyptian crops, and so he received credit for providing the nation's food. He was idolized in statue, citizens bowed to his image, and in the ultimate act of pride, every reigning pharaoh claimed to be the manifestation of at least one god. Akhenaton, Egyptian history's infamous heretic, banished the national pantheon and proclaimed himself to be the living incarnation of the sun god Ra — he believed he was Ra in the flesh.
Whether it's the ancient pharaohs demanding the worship of others, or the millions of modern skeptics who reject God, dethrone Him as Creator, and worship themselves, man's inherent pattern has always been to exalt himself. Rebellion against God can take no higher form than self-love-the person who seeks his own interests at the expense of others and places himself at the center of the universe. That is precisely the condition in which you and I wallowed before we were saved, and that is where, ultimately, everyone who doesn't know the Lord remains.
Many men throughout world history have wanted to become gods, but there has been only one God who wanted to become a Man.
Consider for a moment what it meant for our Lord Jesus to come to earth as a man to secure the salvation of mankind. The King of heaven left His throne and took a stable for a nursery. The very Son of God was hunted by a tyrant king and became an infant exile in Egypt. The owner of heaven and earth was born into poverty and lived without earthly wealth and luxury. The source of all wisdom and knowledge was treated as the greatest of fools.
Holy and without blemish, young Messiah was assaulted by every temptation Satan could thrust on Him, yet He resisted each one to its fullest force. The King of creation willingly subjected Himself to all of what it means to be human — pain, hunger, thirst, sorrow, physical exhaustion, the full range of human emotions — yet did so without sinning.
In an unfathomable act of selfless, sacrificial love, God left heaven's glory to die in sinners' stead. He offered mercy to a people who deserved only His wrath. He stooped to accomplish that which we not only could not do, but also would not do. In love, the God of the universe stepped from eternity to intervene in human history and save those wholly unable to save themselves.
In a word, the lesson we learn from Christmas is love. Christ's love — love that was manifest in His coming, in His life, and in His death — is a love that sacrificed. In the Advent of Jesus Christ, we see a love that sought, not its own needs, but the needs of others. We see a love that considered, not what it would lose, but what others would gain. We see a love that so emptied self that others would be filled; a love that so humbled self that others would be lifted up.
The Christ of Christmas gave to the very end, ultimately forfeiting His own life, so that sinners would find salvation. That's what happened when God became a Man — and that's what Christmas is all about.

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

GodsView : God Will Make a Way!

GodsView : God Will Make a Way!: Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. T...

God Will Make a Way!

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Thousands of Christians in North America have heard one of Don Moen’s praise songs which he wrote to affirm God’s sovereignty in the Christian’s life. However, most Christians who have sung this song do not know the kind of hopelessness from which the lyrics came.
Don Moen was awakened in the middle of the night by a phone call from his mother-in-law; a tragic car accident had just occurred. Don’s sister-in-law, Susan, her husband, and their four little boys were on an automobile trip when tragedy struck. They all were seriously injured, and their eight-year-old son was dying from his injuries.
As Don and his wife grieved and poured out their hearts to the Lord, they felt helpless to communicate any hope to Susan and Craig. Don recalls asking the Lord to help him express hope to the family members. In a very short time, Don scribbled some lyrics and composed the music for a chorus that, to this day, gives believers a deep sense of hope in the midst of difficult times. The lyrics read:
God will make a way,
where there seems to be no way;
He works in ways we cannot see,
He will make a way for me.

He will be my guide,
hold me closely to His side;
With love and strength for each new day,
He will make a way. He will make a way!

To put it simply, the only way to have hope is to have Him. The only way to have peace is to have Him.
As Paul reminds us in Romans 15:13, hope — as well as peace and joy — come through faith. It is true that many people claim to have faith in God during the good times, but when trials come their way, their faith is clearly lacking. In times when our vision of God becomes blurred by sorrow, the eyes of faith are more important than ever.
George Macdonald, author and mentor to C.S. Lewis, once wrote: “I think faith can never have a greater victory than when it will trust even in the midst of darkness and doubt and temptation.” What a great definition of victorious faith! — faith in our victorious God who never loses control of His people...and His planet.
The truth is, God’s will for us isn’t even nullified by our suffering, nor does it end at the grave. Our hope rests in the promise that our lives will stretch far beyond these few fleeting moments on earth, into an eternity of heavenly joy and satisfaction.
Are you willing to believe that God willmake a way where there seems to be no way? He works in ways we cannot see...He will make a way!

Sunday, April 13, 2014

GodsView : The Best Way to Fight Temptation!

GodsView : The Best Way to Fight Temptation!: Temptation. There is no escaping it. But know this: it can help you to deepen and grow spiritually, causing you to cling that much tighter ...

The Best Way to Fight Temptation!

Temptation. There is no escaping it. But know this: it can help you to deepen and grow spiritually, causing you to cling that much tighter to the Lord Himself.
It’s been said, “Christians are a lot like teabags. You don’t know what they are made of until you put them in hot water.” Perhaps you’re in the “hot water” of temptation right now. God has given you a weapon to use, and it’s called the Bible.
When Jesus faced His temptation in the wilderness, He gave us an example to follow, a template to apply. Being God, He could have sent Satan away or even removed Himself from the place where the enemy was. Instead, He faced Satan as a man and stood on ground that we too can occupy.
Each time Jesus was tempted, He quoted the Scripture. We read in Luke 4:12, “And Jesus answered and said to him, ‘It is written, “You shall not tempt the LORD your God.”’” You need to know and quote Scripture when you are tempted. The psalmist wrote, “How can a young man cleanse his way? By taking heed according to Your word” and “Your word I have hidden in my heart, that I might not sin against You!” (Psalm 119:9, 11 nkjv).
It’s good to carry a Bible in your briefcase, backpack, or purse. But the best place to carry the Word of God is in your heart! Why? Because Satan can quote Scripture to you too! Satan entices you, trips you up, and then tells you “God will not forgive you!” We pull out the Sword and reply, “It is written, ‘If we confess our sin, He is faithful and just to forgive us . . .’ ” (1 John 1:9 nkjv).
Satan whispers in your ear, “You’ve sinned, and now God condemns you!” We can come back with, “It is written, ‘There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ . . .’ ” (Romans 8:1 nkjv). The devil tells us, “You’re not going to make it. I’ll get you. You’ll fall again!” You reply, “It is written, ‘And I give unto them eternal life and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand’ ” (John 10:28 kjv).You can also say, “Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it unto the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6 nkjv).
Perhaps when tragedy hits, the enemy will say, “Your life is over, and ruined. God has abandoned you.” You come back with God’s Word! It is written, “God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them” (Romans 8:28 nlt).
When a loved one dies, the enemy says, “That’s it. They are gone. Death is the end!” You reply, “It is written that to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord” (see 2 Corinthians 5:8). Jesus also said, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live” (John 11:25 nkjv).
I encourage you to memorize and use the Word of God when being tempted. It will make all the difference.

Monday, April 7, 2014

GodsView : Endangered Species!

GodsView : Endangered Species!: Remember when men were men? Remember when you could tell by looking? Remember when men knew who they were, liked how they were, and didn&#3...

Endangered Species!

Remember when men were men? Remember when you could tell by looking? Remember when men knew who they were, liked how they were, and didn't want to be anything but what they were?
Remember when it was the men who boxed and wrestled and bragged about how much they could bench press?
Remember when it was the women who wore the makeup, the earrings, and the bikinis?
Remember when it was the men who initiated the contact and took the lead in a relationship, made lifelong commitments, and modeled a masculinity grounded in security and stability?
I'm talking about men who are discerning, decisive, strong hearted, who know where they are going and are confident enough in themselves (and their God) to get them there. Men who aren't afraid to take the lead, to stand tall, firm in their principles, even when the going gets rough.
Such qualities not only inspire the respect of women, they also engender healthy admiration among younger men and boys who hunger for heroes. We need clear-thinking, hard-working, straight-talking men who, while tender, thoughtful, and loving, don't feel the need to ask permission for taking charge.
Over the last three decades we have seen a major assault on masculinity. The results are well represented in the arts, the media, the world of fashion, and among those who have become the heroes of our young people.
On the heels of a bloody Civil War, Josiah Holland wrote a passionate prayer on behalf of our country. It begins, "God, give us men...." But the truth is, God doesn't give a nation men; He gives us boys. Baby boys, adolescent boys, impressionable boys, who need to know what becoming a man is all about. God's plan is still as He designed it at creation. And it starts in the home.
Men, are you modeling manhood according to God's Word? Moms and dads, are you raising your sons to be authentically masculine? If not, why not? Think it over!